Biffy Clyro – Futique (Warner Records) (13th Floor Album Review)

We are told that, ‘after storming Glastonbury and Radio 1’s Big Weekend to headlining TRNSMT, Biffy Clyro have kickstarted a new era. Everything leads up to the release of their new album Futique. The 13th Floor’s Mr. Stevens had had a listen and is not impressed.

I’m not sure who this album is for. I can’t hear the wild tattooed wild man of Scottish post-punk rock. Being surprized is usually a good thing musically, but in this case, it’s more let down than surprized. Released (I’m old-school) on 19th September 2025 on Warner Records/14 Floor. Recorded in Berlin apparently (about fifty years too late) and produced by Jonathan Gilmore (a ‘safe pair of hands’), with a cast of thousands of session players…

A Little Love

Pop sensibilities with a blippy synth sound at the start, this is ballad with tight double-tracked and harmonised vocals. It doesn’t go anywhere in particular. Is it over produced in the way that pop-punk can be? Is it preppy yacht-rock? Not a strong start.

… Hunting Season

The initial riff puts me in in mind of the Sex Pistols Silly Thing, which is a good thing. The lyrics are a bit forced together, they don’t really work, but not in a good way. The chorus is possibly an attempt at big show anthem, and I can see this going down well in that setting. Is it about being cancelled?

Shot One

Hmmm… yep we’re heading back into poppy feel again. Lyrically weak, far too safe for a Biffy song. Next.

True Believer

This is better song construction, there’s some interest in the structure, but I suspect I’m relieved that it’s not as formulaic as the first three. Lyrically, it’s still a bit pedestrian, but I kinda like the message. That glockenspiel break though…

Goodbye

I spoke too soon. Has James Blunt taken to writing for the Biffs, or Chris Martin?

Friendshipping

Crickey, where did this come from? It’s a Biffy song! It’s still very ‘produced’ though, which is pity. On this album, even the better songs seem to have been watered down. This could be a great live song, but in this form… ‘pity.

Woe is Me, Wow is You

Better lyric writing and some engaging structure on this one. It’s on the ‘right’ side of raw… for this album. The strings are bearable because of the ‘lads’ very Scottish sounding BVs.

It’s Chemical

By now it’s sounding like this album was written in a very short period and then ‘studioed’. The tempos are pretty much all the same and none of them quick enough, or slow enough, or broken enough. This is what I think an over-commercial Green Day out-take sounds like.

A Thousand And One

Frustrating. A promising start gets horribly predictable very quickly. It’s slower, and more thoughtful, but the chorus is phrased like a boy-band one-hand-wavey ballad, with accompanying heart beating bridge.

Dearest Amygdala

All that’s missing here is an actual Georgio Moroder synth arpeggio sequence running through it. I see headbands, leg-warmers, and roller-skates. Dear 1980s, take this band back to their alien masters and bring us back Biffy Clyro! Don’t be fooled by the bridge either, it could all have that high-energy disco thing going on

Two Pebbles In Love

Oh, 5:4… OK, that’s better. More lyrical Meh though. Musically it’s got interest, some nice changes of time signature, and you can feel that it’s an attempt to finish the album on a high. Is it the last song I wonder?

Oh, yes, it is. Well then, even the least predicable and most interesting song on the album turns out to be predictable and therefore less interesting after all.

Mr. Stevens

Futique is out now on Warner Records.